friends.

I have alot of friends, and they come and go.
But i do have certain friends, which i keep them dearly in my hearts
SOme friends, just know me for a while, met online or through friends.
some friends, i knew them for years
When i have problems, the closest to me i share is with ayun.
Rarely i share to other prople except to complain, or when im having troubles with ayun himself.

Even my mum says she doent know who i am anymore
and
Mum says dad is worried about me,
that i've been going out to much, party and enjoying too much
and i did not study at all

I am not myself, but i dont feel like a loser either.
I feel bad about this,
maybe when it comes to studying, maybe im not good at it
When it comes to studies, i shine the least compared to my sisters.

I have nothing to make my parents proud,so they can brag about me with their friends...
Im just, stupid i guess.

I ruin alot of things, and most of the time, i dont mean it
I wish i can take it all back, before i lose my loved one's...



so here it goes

My family
to dad: sorry i always lepak at night, always coming back late.you must be worried sick
to mum: sorry i am always spending your money, and not go to class and study
to kak jackie: sorry you have to pay for my college fees, i hope o dont burden you.
to kak rose: sorry i drop bella once in malaysia, i really dont know how to take care of babies and toddlers back then
to kak mel: sorry i am the manja sister, and u always have to tell me things to do
to amy: sorry for not being a role model sister


and this is to my best friend, Thea,

sorry of what i wrote, sorry for what i did. I mean no harm, and maybe my words let you down, maybe my words are wrong, i never meant it. I never mean to be such a bitter. I dont mean to make u cry. Sorry. I know im such a disapointment.

And also to Tg. Aishah, Beehah, Yaya, and other people i know. Sorry if i make u sad, angry and down

Love you all very much,
Aisyah Adliana Binti Mohd Amran De Costa